From The Pastor’s Heart By DR. ROBERT KENNEDY, OP-ED
If you ask my wife and I about the most common theme that runs through the lives of several couples we have given premarital counseling, she will say as I do, “FEAR.”
Yes, fear has been allowing couples to break up many times before they get to counseling. They are fearful of breaking up just like their parents. They are fearful of not being able to resolve the conflicts they might face. And they are afraid that their relationships will just go south like their friends.
Fear is crippling many couples as they seek to keep the relationship going, and so they are scared to make the final commitment to getting married. Some we know, not those we have counseled, but many have decided that they prefer to shack up instead of pledging their lives together “until death do us part.”
There is a greater fear than what is driving the nation and the world, than that which is impacting couples, namely the fear of the coronavirus. The news that more than 17,000,000 have already contracted the disease, and more about 700,000 have died worldwide is more than alarming. The United States is leading the way with more than a quarter of all cases and deaths.
Yes, some of the doctors who are treating patients with the disease are also dying. Nurses are dying. Nursing homes are overwhelmed with the disease, and a high percentage of their residents are dying. Young people are now getting the disease, and some are dying. Even children are getting sick and dying. The disease is spiking in many parts of the United States and many parts of the world.
In some parts of the United States, ICU beds in hospitals are still being overwhelmed. With the most considerable efforts to secure PPE, there is still shortages. “Everybody” is searching the internet or sending some push notifications on what to take to avoid the disease. Listening to the news outlets for the latest updates seems to be more needful now than ever before.
Much of what is being forwarded to be shared with friends on WhatsApp, YouTube, or other social media platforms have no verifiability, but they are being forwarded anyway. The stock markets are volatile as the wait for the next news about COVID-19 vaccines. One day, the stock markets are up 100, 200, 300, or 400, another day they are down by the same numbers.
As people were told that the world was about to face a pandemic such as it has never seen, they went into a panic buying mode. They were stocking up on nonperishable foods, and paper products that they are now saying were too much for them. Of course, many have lost their jobs and can hardly find enough to eat, except what they can get from the food banks and other places.
People are so afraid of one another that it is profoundly amazing the reactions expressed for any who will not wear masks. I am not seeking to trivialize mask-wearing, but I notice even my reactions when passing anyone without a mask. I mask up, and I even veer off the walk-path to keep the social distance on the other side. Many people are getting rich as they have found a new way to push the consumerist button on masks.
In addition to masks, additional measures such as schools being closed, and teachers and children must learn to work together from home using different learning platforms, as are now in place to deal with the present fears. What has never been tried before now being done. And now that it is time to open school again, one group, led by the president of the United States, is calling for the physical opening of schools. Another group is saying, let us stay on the internet learning platforms until we feel safer to open.”
Sports teams that had stopped playing are trying to find ways of returning to play, but are finding themselves in the most challenging situations that they have ever faced. Many teams are finding that some of their teammates have contracted the coronavirus.
Churches have remained closed because some have experienced outbreaks. Family gatherings are being rescheduled. Some of my friends have opted and opting to celebrate their anniversaries on Zoom, and my wife and I are gladly celebrating with them.
I could go on to describe the fears of people everywhere, but the point that I wish to make is simply that our fears will not cure this disease or settle our social problems.
The fears we face, at this time, are driving us crazy. Such fears might help:
1. To fill the coffers of the rich. 2. To build the consumerist culture, as many people engage in panic buying. 3. To raise pharmaceutical stocks. 4. To force other products to become very expensive. 5. To make us more vulnerable to accepting recommendations of “bad medicine.” 6. Many to accept some of the weirdest conspiracy theories. 7. To get us a vaccine much earlier than what was ever done in any generation, as the president boasts. 8. To increase the sending of more notes of encouragement than any other time.
However, we need something more than what this world is offering to calm our fears. Let me offer what can truly drive away our fears. I have taken only two suggestions from the Bible:
1. That we need the presence of God in our midst.
Here is one text on the presence of God in the midst of us: “Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ (Isaiah 41:10 NKJV)
What is it about God’s presence that drives away human fears? Where God is present, there is life, health, healing, protection, peace, hope, and the building of genuine relationships.
2. That where love is, it drives away fear.
We also read in a Bible text from 1 John 4:18 (NKJV) that says, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.”
It is being discovered that our lack of love, care, compassion, concern for each there is even driving up the disease, and making our fears more severe. Therefore, I suggest that we think more about how we can allow the love of God to grow in our hearts so that we can be less fearful than we have ever been.
In effect, let us allow God’s presence and ask him to let our love be perfected so that we will lessen the fears we are facing at this time.
