THE OBSERVATION BOOTH
OP / ED & PHOTO CREDITS ANDREA DIALECT
MONKEY BUSINESS
ENJOY THE FOLLOWING DRAFT…. Won’t be no more monkeys jumping on beds – let that one tell it. My daughter and Granny’s daughter entered the room early that Sunday morning, and after opening the door I ran back to my bed and jumped back in.
I was lying there when the two entered. All the interesting objects and things lying around were vying for her attention. The pile of children’s books was enticing for certain and was immediately disheveled the moment she came in. So I got no hello and no eye contact – obviously, little mama had work to do. As we chit-chatted, that little thang touched my stuff as she pleased: touching this, yanking that, knocking down this, and throwing that.
She tossed my things around like trash – even my beloved treasures had been game. I was protesting the whole time as I watched and prayed. While redirecting her toward my bedside, her mama started singing one of her favorite nursery rhymes. It was the short version of Five Little Monkeys, with a new hook stretched into a longer song.
My “no” to my stuff being mishandled had been snatched and turned into a sing-song by her and her mama. So when that little monkey lying on the bed jumped off and bumped its head, and mama called the doctor, the doctor said no more monkeys jumping on the bed – the lyrical plays of mine didn’t stand a chance. The new version went, “no, no, no, no, no” about ten times, backed with attitude, while peering down at the family matriarch lying on the bed.
As if scolding me as she had taken that little pointer finger of hers and started pointing. It was so tiny it was laughable. At first, I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. But oh boy, I had gotten it. That stubby little finger looked just like one of my childhood snacks – my once-beloved crunchy cheese doodles. Not all, but just one. Stiff, shapely, and adding impact.
This was her reply to my “leave all my thangs alone” – that directive not to bother mine. When my daughter was winding down the monkey business, she babbled along to the last few words with all that baby talk. But as her mama my other baby revisited the hook, like a guard dog her ears perked up like a pit bull.
That “no” was like a whistle, and she joined in – wasn’t no babbling, nor stumbling over words this time. Her “no” was clear, enunciated like a British scholar. She put that little finger in the air and stepped even closer. Now she was hovering above me as I lay flat on my back while she stood at my bedside, acting out the little monkey song, repeating that hook.
“No” plus “no’s” clearly meant no monkey jumping on the bed Which also meant no monkey lying in the bed should be telling her what not to touch when she isn’t in it. As the two serenaded me with their “no’s” – boy, if you could have only seen her expression.
The intensity on her face – and the way she acted it out, you had to be there. She spit those lyrical “no’s” that one spoken word, hovering above me with a weight that felt like chains of command, like bling forcibly draped around my neck.
She ain’t much for words, but she knows a no and she means it. That little girl may not have been able to say or sing the monkey song, but I learned from the way she held that note: some monkeys need to stay in bed while others do whatever they want. And that pretty little face was so convicting.
What tickles me the most, when I replay it in my head, is that as the two serenaded me, I decided to join in. I belted out “no’s” while raising my own finger to point which looks like my other favorite childhood snack that puffed cheese doodle, joining in on the fun.
Remember – I’m lying in bed. I got about three or four “no’s” in before she stopped her song cold. As I swung my pointer back and forth theatrically, she stepped back for emphasis – then stepped right back up, grabbed my finger tight, and with a snarl on that pretty little face, held me firm.
She didn’t say “no,” but darn it I heard it clear as day. Telepathically, I suppose, but loud and clear. At one year old and a month or two, she used force and emotion to claim authority – her right to touch any dang-on thang in my room she pleased. I’d been punked, and boy, had I learned my lesson.
Now I’m almost afraid to sit or lay on my own bed if Aria’s in the room. And as long as she’s one year old and a month or two, can’t talk, and don’t know the words to songs – she can jump, move, break, or touch whatever she wants. Within reason, of course.
This stuff that tickles me now will soon fade. About then, we’ll both outgrow the monkeying around song, looking for something new. Maybe one of my ol favorite childhood nursey rhymes like I’ll say, “Are you sleepy, are you sleepy?” and she’ll chime, “Yes, I am.” staying true to this yes-and-no thang, or I’ll do my research and find something that fits so we might continue that narrative.
So I’ll let her have it, for now, ‘cause no means no – just like she said. I’ll give her another year or two. Then she’ll know more words. One of them will be the opposite of “no.”
It will be that “yes, Granny” all the other offsprings had long mastered, trust me. By then she’ll know, my little pumpkin is the difference (lol).
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DID YOU KNOW….
Ever since the invention of beds, kids have loved to jump on them – the springier the better. Similarly, ever since the invention of beds and the decision for kids to jump on them as high as they can, parents have been attempting to dissuade the young ones from doing so. Why? Injury, of course.
That work has created the popular children’s song and nursery rhyme, “Five Little Monkeys.”
Song Lyrics
Five little monkeys jumping on the bed.
One fell off and bumped his head.
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said,
“No more monkeys jumping on the bed!”
Four little monkeys jumping on the bed.
One fell off and bumped his head.
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said,
“No more monkeys jumping on the bed!”
Three little monkeys jumping on the bed.
One fell off and bumped her head.
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said,
“No more monkeys jumping on the bed!”
Two little monkeys jumping on the bed.
One fell off and bumped his head.
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said,
“No more monkeys jumping on the bed!”
One little monkey jumping on the bed.
She fell off and bumped her head.
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said,
“No more monkeys jumping on the bed!”
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