Live In Harmony With One Another

FROM THE PASTOR’S HEART

OP / ED BY DR. ROBERT KENNEDY

I am not advertising their service, but in taking note of the appeal of the apostle Paul that called the church members in Rome to “Live in harmony with one another,” I reference eHarmony, the online dating service directed towards the goal of relationship building.

If you are unaware of the service, let me explain more that it is a dating platform where single women meet and men. They claim that those who direct the service know what it takes to help people find compatible partners by the use of personality and other tests. Their most remarkable claim is that they make perfect matches. Another claim is that they are a safe dating space, one that’s free of fake profiles. You can flag anything that feels suspicious. Basic membership is free, and you can view information about your matches at no charge.

I have not checked to see how many of the perfect matches have broken up, but from all my knowledge and experience as a pastor, I know that many breakups have taken place because it is not just the perfect matching at the start of any relationship but what is put into the relationship to help it sustain. If you reflect on the Biblical story of creation, you will know that even the perfect pair placed in the Garden of Eden found a way to mess up. Then they began to shame and blame each other for the state in which they found themselves.

The point I am making is that whether we are in our homes, churches, or other institutions of our society, the apostle Paul’s appeal that we must “live in harmony with one another,” needs to be directed to us. If this must become a possibility, we must put away the negative relationships listed below.

1. Pride that is the foundation of all the sins and conflicts that arise in our hearts.
2. Self-centeredness that makes us most defensive.
3. Distrust that makes us so suspicious of one another.
4. Lusts that allow us to hurt those around us.
5. Prejudices that cause us to disdain those we think are not like us.
6. Self-justification that makes us blame others.
7. False imagination that makes us think evil of everyone we meet.
8. The suspicions that allow us to perceive everyone as enemies.
9. Contentiousness that we do over trivial matters.

And instead, we must adopt the positives that, not only, bring us into harmonious relationships but sustain them. I speak of:

1. Love that calls us to give ourselves, in obedience and commitment, service, sacrifice, and even suffering for others. 
2. Grace that helps us to build bridges to repair when breaks come in the relationship. Grace is the “undeserved favor” given when there is no merit.
3. Forgiveness: Given to cover a wrong.
4. Respect: Shows that we esteem the other person.
5. Acceptance of differences that helps us to understands that not everyone is like me. Each person is different, but each is important to the body.
6. Trust which takes away the constant suspicion of the other.
7. Empathy and compassion will help us to stand in the place of the other person, feel with them what they are feeling.
8. Tolerance That teaches patience even when we disagree with the actions of others.
9. The Holy Spirit that enables us to build harmony. The Holy Spirit is the most incredible unitive force in the universe. He spreads love in our hearts. He makes us love even those who might treat us as enemies.

Yes, we are called to live in harmony with one another (Romans 12:16), for without harmony, we will be in a constancy of strife and destruction.

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