THE OBSERVATION BOOTH
OP-ED BY ANDREA DIALECT
TAKE 1: Last night’s conversation with a friend triggered a recall and I remembered an occurrence that happened about 6 months ago: I was walking with Phenomenal and as we were passing one of the Army recruitment offices, I ran into one of my boys and we stood there chatting for about an hour or so. By this time Phenomenal had gotten quite comfortable with him.
He’d gone into the office and got him a bible, a pad and pencils, crayons, and a couple of other things. So at that point, Phenomenal was sold! He was being deployed that day. So, there I was dishing the ol motherly advice and whatnot. He walked us a ways and then doubled back. As we were about to cross the intersection. Phenom stops short and starts calling back to Jah. with his hands waving he shouted. ” WAIT, WAIT, Mr. Jah WAIT, Mr. Jah.” Jah responds, “What’s up Phenom!” With full vocal force and one of the most serious faces I’ve ever seen, Phenomenal shouts back. DON’T… GET… KILLED!!!!
I suppose that Jah, had given Phenom something and He wanted to give something back. I was able to use that this morning when lying in bed wrestling with myself. Amazingly “not getting killed” as a defense, is basically just being still and allowing myself to be engulfed by whatever comes. It meant never selling my soul, never trading my birthright for it. Never denouncing my purpose nor my GOD!
That is a powerful statement. But, something showed up in my dream last night that will aid me in my future fights even more so. In my dream, I was constantly being bombarded by the imagery of Africa. Images quite similar to those that are often shown by the media, the usual mayhem and scarcity. Then I began seeing flashes of a very familiar image that now like nothing else has the ability to galvanize my God-given ability to fight.
DEATH & GAZE …
That image of the African woman and child is not new to me. It has been stuck in my head since I was a child. Throughout the years I have seen several images of various women and children. Same scenario. Just woman and child sitting there in the middle of nowhere surrounded by dirt, dust, and nothingness with flies resting on them and flying all about. This was always shown in the media, and I was ashamed of it.
But last night that image became something different. When I saw it before. I saw it to be a public display of lack or the galvanizing of it in one’s head in support of it, all under the guise of help. The father’s absence was appalling to me. But the child became very significant last night.
There they are in the middle of nothingness. Flies flying all about. Do you know how much of a nuisance flies are? But, this child is not crying. He has not succumbed to the pangs of hunger, and he is young. So, can you imagine the strength of his father?
Here, the father’s strength is displayed in his seed, nonetheless the power is in the gaze. It’s dead-on at cha. They don’t blink. Their focus is unwavering under the hand of the annoyances. Unmoving under the hand of scrutiny and unaffected by the taunts of DEATH!
These two knew their image quite well before the cameras began to roll. That image says. Yes, tell them. Tell them we do not buckle under force. We are unmoved by the illusion of nothingness. We are certain of who we are and why we are here. Yes, show them that.
THIS IS THE AUTHENTIC IMAGE OF THE MADONNA. HER IMAGE ONCE AGAIN FOSTERS ATTEMPTS TO BE REPLICATED. WHAT A COMPLIMENT! All these years my views had been distorted. I am certain now that in all our blindness our FATHER, MOTHER, and CHILD to us appear to be in the worst way.
It’s like this African guy I met a couple of years back. He came to me and says that he had been watching me walk for a while. He went on to ask me, in his native accent “WHO ARE YOU, WHAT ARE YOU?” I said what am I? Then he says yes, where are you from? Where are you born?”
“Born? I was born here, I assured him” I’m American. I was raised in Paterson. Then with this sorrowful look in his eyes, he replies. “OH, I FEEL SO SORRY FOR YOU!!!” Yet, I’d been looking at AFRICA with pity.
We must reevaluate strength. We must reevaluate war, we must reevaluate fight. In our darkest hour, there are times when we must simply STAND. Fighting doesn’t always mean throwing your hands up. War doesn’t always mean bombs being dropped and boots on the ground and just because I don’t look like your worst nightmare, doesn’t mean I ain’t!
Thus, when you are in a real fight such as fear, uncertainty, lust, rage, pity, and all those things that are hidden behind the guise of normalcy and other people and help. When you need real aid. First and far most WATCH! Then, conjure up the image of the two. Know that the absence of the father (God) means that this is his light work. But if you need him, he’ll be there. You’ll hear those voices echoing out. “Look ‘em dead in the eyes. Don’t you blink… ” Don’t You DIE!
