THE OBSERVATION BOOTH
OP / ED & PHOTO CREDITS ANDREA DIALECT
Hood Chronicles
Reflections…The Sun rises in the sky. A Son rises in your life. The Sun gives warmth to the Earth. A Son gives warmth to your heart. The Sun shines light on everything it touches. A Son, when well guided, becomes the light in dark places. The Sun fuels the world with energy and life. A Son, when nurtured, fuels the future with purpose and promise. The Sun holds planets in place with its invisible pull. A Son holds family, dreams, and legacy with his silent strength. The Sun shows up every day – sometimes behind clouds, but always there. A Son might struggle, might stumble, but when he shines – It is a reminder of his presence. One is in the sky. The other in your heart. But both… are light, power, legacy and life.
This draft is dedicated to my dear friend Barry Alston. When I call upon him no matter what he is there as clay in support of my “Experimental” work. He goes to the depths of himself. Even when that means the excavation of his pain. Barry your dedication to humanity and service doesn’t go unnoticed. You shall be greatly blessed.
Readers, today we get a sneak peek into Barry’s present day challenges and struggles. He assures that this solo act propels him forward. How honorable this selfless bird’s eye view. A living testament that’s helpful and inspiration to us all.
Visit Localtalkweekly.com to read the full story in the Entertainment section. While you’re at it, check out the archives and the enjoyment of the Fine Artistry subjects that accompany my words, like Mr. Sunny here. Get familiar with all things Andrea Dialect. You’ll also want to come along on my Andrea Dialect Facebook Lab live session. Buried treasures turn up every morning. Come and join me live as I develop my daily “PORTAL” sessions. I’ll see you between 5-6 a.m. Set those notifications. Remember, everything I do on social is raw, homegrown, and experimental mockups. Follow my msdialect Instagram, and let’s grow out loud together! Like, follow, and share.
CALL OF DUTY
I want my mom (Carrie Alston) to know, if nothing else. That she is loved!
Role Reversal…A lot of the things that my older siblings had to go through growing up I didn’t. As a child I never wanted for anything. I was extremely spoiled. Although I am the youngest of all my siblings, no one else stepped in so I had to; Although it shouldn’t be that way because my mom has helped so many. But it’s just me now and I’m going to be there for my mother. I can’t speak for nobody else. It’s my job to provide for her and protect her. That’s a given. She’s my mother.
Only God makes it possible. I do this one day at a time. I stepped into this not really knowing how severe things were and what needed to be done. I really don’t have much support. My boy Terrence checks on me daily. There are a couple individuals that check on me from time to time but overall it’s just me. It is what it is.
Honestly, a lot of things that my older siblings had to go through growing up I didn’t. That’s another kind of role reversal that I’m dealing with I guess. But when it comes to my mom coping with that type of role reversal is different.
I do what I can. It’s depressing for me going up to the rehabilitation center and seeing different individuals suffering too. But I have to do it. I can imagine what it is for her. So I try to make her stay easier. My mom likes sweets and she likes certain foods. I cook for her periodically and bring her a little treat here and there to the hospital. I try to do things that will bring a smile to her face.
I definitely camouflage how I feel and what I’m dealing with to keep going. I’ve been battling with the spirit of depression lately. I hide that from her because she doesn’t need to know.
To any of you out there dealing with such role reversal in doing so – find time to take care of yourself. Find time for you. One thing that I’ve learned and noticed is that I’m taking care of my mom but it’s not just my mom. Seemingly everybody has a need for Barry. Everybody has something that they want from Barry. I am so used to taking care of everybody else but at the end of the day who’s taking care of me? Who’s making sure that I’m good? You’ll definitely see how insensitive people are. Just take care of yourself. You need some sort of balance because if you don’t take care of you, you can’t be no good for nobody else. That’s one of the things I’m learning. I had to find that balance.
I’ve also learned that there is a different level of endurance when you’re a caregiver especially when you’re doing it by yourself. It’s a testament of strength and faith and your belief. More importantly, if it weren’t for the Lord I would have lost my mind these past months. It’s a growing process. It’s recognizing stuff for what it is. This showed – showingly, if nobody else got me, God’s got me. It’s sad to say that you’re going to really see who’s for you in times like this when you’re going through. You may have a lot going on and you be there for everybody and you don’t have anyone there to listen to you.
I do everything. I do my mother’s laundry. She lives with me now. The other day I got a notice the other day one of her bills was due from this past January. I had to run and get that paid. It’s constantly something. Dealing with these doctors and her appointments. I’m not working now as much.
I still have to do what I have to do for myself. Taking care of my responsibilities at the church. My mom doesn’t say much. I don’t think that she understands the magnitude of what I do. But I’ll do it again and again.
One thing about me – I’ve never ran from a challenge. Everything I put my hands to is blessed. And even though it’s a great challenge I will make it, we will make it through. Because that’s my mom. I love her!
DID YOU KNOW….
While women remain the majority of family caregivers for aging parents, a significant number of men are also involved in providing care. In the United States, about 40% of all caregivers are men, and of that group, a large portion, estimated at around 16 million, are caring for an aging parent, spouse, or other relative.
Men’s Health Awareness
Of all caregivers in the United States, 16 million, or 40% are men. Of these men: 63% identified as primary caregivers. 50% are caregivers by choice, the other half felt obligated to take on the role. – Aug 9, 2022
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