THE OBSERVATION BOOTH / OP-ED By Andrea Dialect

Whispers Of Comfort

It’s estimated that the majority of adults do not have any formal listening education. Yet, the average person misunderstands, ignores or forgets at least 75% of what they listen to. ‘Listening’ is definitely not the same thing as ‘hearing’. The costs of poor listening are too high to ignore, including loss of relationships, opportunities, trust, respect, credibility, money, and even loss of life, just to name a few. People lose when they don’t listen! – Rick Bommelje (Listening Seeker)

The above statement jumped at me off the page; there was a slap afterwards. That’s when I realized that it was auditioning, no more so demanding its place to trail today’s topic header. So, I gave it that once over and my thoughts are if we don’t listen when one speaks normally what are the chances of our adhering to a whisper?

But, all is not lost; especially, with-in the context of this article and as in all else there’s a loop hole. We have the power to halt speech and utilize imagery. As Indigenous people I strongly believe that our language is pictures. We speak in imagery. Through our ear gate we perceive in pictures. (Google the instrumental Eargate … Andrea Dialect$ Stumbled Upon)

More importantly, our comprehension is etched through pictures. Unfortunately those who have knowledge of that continue to monopolize from it. But, right now it is high time that we do. As in everything I dabble in right down to writing this article my medium is a picture that I aim to write.

This past Sunday I had the honor of interviewing two amazing women @ D2 Studios. (Thanks Chap) In support of an ongoing project that I’m working on. Ironically, I was moved to feature the two as this week and next week’s Page Jackers.

VILLAGE COUNCIL

Logically “Whispers of Comfort” is imperative when the focus is grief. Ms. Coston is a lot more than a pretty face. When grief became focus as they say she didn’t talk about it. She decided to be about it. A beautiful and caring spirit and as a woman of few words. Our interview was brief but straight to the point…

Aisha Coston – Founder of Newark’s Fallen Soldiers Memorial (Support Facebook Page)

When my children’s father passed, I wanted to post his picture in remembrance of him and I found that other towns had memorial pages. Towns like Paterson and, Orange I believe and, a few others at the time. But I could not find one for the city of Newark. So I decided to make one. My kid’s dad (Chamonds Terrell) passed away on September 8, 2007.  

The page was created on April 6, 2010.  I wanted to post a picture in his remembrance at the time, couldn’t find a memorial page for our town. So I made one. But, the page really didn’t do much for several years at first. At most there was a little over a thousand people that had come through and used it. For about three or four years at least then all of a sudden it was crazy. People started coming to the page, posting on the page. The numbers were growing a lot. At this point, today were at around 46, 000 followers.

Sometimes it can be very overwhelming because as the Administrator I am the only one maintaining it. Over the course of time, I have had a few people come thru to support as moderators. But it didn’t work out. It’s about 100 new people coming to join the page daily. I also have to   go through the post. To eliminate spam and people posting things that are unrelated to our mission. Presently I am looking for moderators to support the maintenance of the group and to assist with making the page even more so a resource for our community, Jersey and anyone else who is in need of a space to their loved one’s life and those in need of resources.

I am grateful to each and every one that has supported the page and made Newark’s Fallen Soldiers Page the resource that it has become. Feel free to continue sharing, posting and visiting our Newark Fallen Soldiers Page. Most importantly please continue to support our community. Anyone interested in becoming a moderator, or if knowledgeable of any organizations or resources that can be of benefit to our fallen soldier’s family feel free to direct message me on the page. May God bless and Keep you all! – Aisha

I have visited the Newark Fallen Soldiers page on many occasions. I go there to kind of be in the know. My first experience with death was when I was four years old, my dad passed. I don’t think I understood what was going on at the time but I’m sure that I was affected by it because he was no longer there. That loss has affected my life. My mother and her mom, my grandma died only one day apart. I was twelve years old when my grandma and my mother left me. Sadly, my Twenties were very uncertain and hard times for me. Once again there was such loss. My nephew was murdered then a few weeks later my brother and my sister passed away. Since then, death has shown up several times.  Because of my loosing so many loved ones to death sometimes the pain surfaces. But I won’t let heartache erase what God is doing in my life. So I continue to push forwards looking and praying for better days! – Princess

As writing this piece, Princess came to mind. We spoke about the Memorial page a few weeks before. It was during that time that she shared her life journey with me. What a beautiful soul. Its mindboggling how little we know about the true life story of those we think we know. I am told that through it all God’s supporting whispers had been her comfort. Be on the lookout for her upcoming interview about her journey and her new upcoming book venture. What a heart wrenching peek into times which although had been dimly lit, yet ever present was the shadows of your strength. Thank you for sharing your journey with us Lady Princess. May God forever bless and keep you!

We are so grateful there are many resources out the servicing our communities and supporting our world. The people and those organization that make our world go around much easier.  Unfortunately, loss comes in many forms. As to date 2022 it is said that 33,203 lives were loss to Covid; although New Jersey is said to be one of the states who has less gun deaths capita by state at 14.7 % along with Massachusetts the lowest in the U.S in my opinion that is much too high and sadly those stats reflect that 60% of those deaths are by suicide. When it comes to loss there are too many ways to count its reach.

Thank God for all those out there spreading those whispers of comfort. May the departed souls rest in peace!

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By KS

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